489. New Calendar
© Bruce Goodman 11 February 2015

How Algernon came to power was anyone’s guess. The fact was, he was in charge. And what a tyrant!

He ruled over his world. He got up in the morning and issued a new decree. How he got his lackeys to enforce things, no one knew. But enforce they did.

Algernon was going through a phase. He liked order. So he arranged the days of the week alphabetically. They went: Friday, Monday, Saturday, Sunday, Thursday, Tuesday, Wednesday.

Then he decided to arrange the months into alphabetical order. April, August, December, February, January, July, June, March, May, November, October, September.

Then he twigged on to an even better idea. Each day of the week was attached to a family member. His daughter, Libretto, for example, was eighteen. Each 6th day of the week for that year was 18 Libretto. The following year each 6th day was 19 Libretto. His son, Braxton, was fourteen. Every 2nd day of the week was 14 Braxton. And so on.

But how best to number the years themselves in a way that was both creative and useful? He started with A. Then AA. Then AAA. Then AAAA…

It got rid of the old calendar which reeked of religion - ancient Roman and Greek and Norse gods and papal stuff. Besides, the old calendar didn't have any reference to Islam, and these days it was good to be inclusive. It was such a modern system. The United Nations adopted it instantly.

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