232. Skiing lesson
© Bruce Goodman 30 May 2014

Heather was pleased. She was going to the mountain to ski. All her friends were going. They had all skied before. This was Heather’s first time on a ski field.

Sensibly, she paid to have a lesson. And there he was! The ski instructor! He was German! My God! Was he handsome or what! Heather would’ve paid twice the amount for the lesson. Hopefully she would fall over numerous times and he would have to help her up. He was all good looks and muscles!

Oh! There were twenty others in the learning group. Still… one never knows…

Heather slowly skied down the short gentle practice slope, as instructed.

“Legs apart!” shouted the German at her. “Legs apart, pig fit through!”

“Do you mean,” asked Heather, “that my legs were apart and should be together, or my legs were together and should be apart?”

“Yes,” said the German. “Legs apart. Pig fit through.”

That was the end of the expensive lesson. Ridiculous man. Quite ugly really. He seemed to be all ski suit padding. He paid a lot more attention to the young man who followed her down the slope.

“Legs apart. Pig fit through.”

“Yes, indeed!” thought Heather.

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