87. Paper Napkins
© Bruce Goodman 5 January 2014




Lois just happened to live in the same pretty lane as Meredith, Irene, Dorothy and Dulcie. Meredith, Irene, Dorothy and Dulcie were snobs. There were only five houses in the lane. Once a month, the five women of the five houses would take turns hosting a luncheon for each other.

Lois felt a little out of place, but took her turn at providing the lunch. She did her best.

Meredith served a seared sword fish salad topped with lime dressing.

Irene served bacon with an Irish Mist glaze and a new potato with a parsley cream sauce.

Dorothy served hickory smoked salmon on buttered leeks.

Dulcie served Sicilian stuffed rice balls with a courgette and carrot ragu.

When it came Lois’ turn, the other four were in a dither. The four had been invited to Lady Sadgrove’s for drinks later that afternoon. Lady Sadgrove was the social queen of the town. They needed to prepare. They weren’t sure therefore if they should cancel Lois’ luncheon. Lois insisted that they did not cancel their luncheon with her. She had prepared!

She served a simple soup with a sprig of lavender and cinnamon croutons. Meredith, Irene, Dorothy and Dulcie thought the soup was divine. “Simply out of this world“, said Meredith to Lois. “But a brief word of advice: don’t ever, in a thousand years, use paper napkins again.”

“Paper napkins!” uttered Irene, Dorothy and Dulcie in disbelieving unison. “Delicious soup, but... my goodness, paper napkins!”

Lois waved them goodbye. “Enjoy the drinks at Lady Sadgrove’s”, she called cheerfully.

Lois knew it would take several hours before the Jerusalem artichoke soup she had served would cause an out-of-control embarrassing amount of flatulence.


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