316. In praise of the Net
© Bruce Goodman 22 August 2014

Mrs. Margery Adelaide Dawes, daughter of the late Mr. and Mrs. Oswald Sternberg, decided to research her family tree.

It was possible to research it online. It was only $29.95 a month. Just enter a name here, it said, and let’s see what information is in our data base.

Eureka! Look at that! Someone had already done the research! The tree to which she was connected had already been done. She was descended from Charlemagne himself!

From Charlemagne! There’s a list of his children! Their mother: the Empress Hildegarde of Savoy! WOW! Royal blood! And then down from Emperor Louis I of the Holy Roman Empire! And King John of England! Her blood was bluer than Prince George Alexander Louis of Cambridge.

Thus it was that Mrs. Margery Adelaide Dawes née Sternberg of Stoneybrick in East Hawtonville (population 27) had more misinformation than all the university professors put together.

Margery was asked by her local Genealogical Society to speak at a meeting.

“Let me begin,” she gushed, with a slight hint of royal accent in her voice, “let me begin by praising the Net.”

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