68. Farewell, O Catheter
© Bruce Goodman 17 December 2013
Bill had gone for six months with a urinary catheter. He’d had a major operation, during which a catheter was inserted. The hospital ward’s night nurse had accidentally tripped over the catheter’s plastic hose, pulling the catheter and Bill’s dick for half a mile across the ward. Whereupon Bill woke the hospital by shouting out a thunderous “FUCK!”
The medical specialists, given Bill’s recent serious operation, decided to forgo any rectification of his waterworks for a further six months.
And then... oh the relief for Bill! To be able to pee freely with the catheter out!
He thought long as to how to best reward himself for gaining his newfound liberty. He would buy a new pillow for his bed! That’s what he’d do! Off he went to the biggest bedroom-bathroom store in town.
The place was crowded. It was an end-of-season sale. Bill found the pillow aisle. There, surrounded by hundreds of shoppers, and with no warning, he wet his pants. Picture Bill standing in a pool of piss in the pillow passageway, with an impossible-to-ignore huge dark wet area in the front of his trousers.
There was nothing else for it. Bill boldly strode through the store and to his automobile – pillowless and dripping.
To this day, as far as anyone knows, he hasn’t been back to make a purchase.