3079. Nice to meat you © Bruce Goodman 8 January 2025

You might not believe it, but a country bumpkin called Todd had some pigs that would dance when he played his flute. When the bottom fell out of the pork, bacon, and ham market, he didn’t know what to do because his bank account was empty. That was when he decided to take his dancing pigs on tour. The first couple of months was great. The Pig Trot was a favourite dance. But then other people started getting their pigs to dance, and some of the other pig dancers were better than Todd’s dancers. Soon other entrepreneurs began to hog the market. There was only one thing for it: Todd had to diversify. He thought he’d try dancing giraffes. The advantage was that giraffes are hard to get hold of, so not too many others would be able to copy his idea. But the idea of dancing giraffes was fraught with danger. There were simply too many broken legs. When Molly, the best dancer of the lot, put her neck out while break dancing, Todd declared that enough was enough. He folded up his dancing giraffe company and marketed giraffe meat instead – along with recipes. Apparently one giraffe neck is enough to feed a family of six for almost three weeks. Meat to dance; dance to meat. It’s funny how things go round and around. Contact Author Back to Index Next Story Previous Story