I thought I’d start my niece off by teaching her how to become a tooth fairy, but the whole profession is so overrun by hacks and fakes that it proved to be a worthless venture. There’s not a great deal of openings for budding tooth fairies these days. So many young ones get disillusioned and begin inhabiting hawthorn bushes, and goodness me! do they turn nasty or what? I warned my niece about it, but there’s no telling the young ones anything these days. She was into the hawthorn bush cavorting with questionable company before I could flap a wing.
It all came to a tragic end when the farmer sprayed the hawthorn bush with poison. Too many thorns. All the vagrant fairies – including my niece – perished. These human farmers are so crass. They think they own the world. Well, I took it out on him. Justice was called for. When his grandchildren lost their teeth they didn’t get a penny for a single one. I saw to it. And then the stupid farmer’s wife stepped in and pretended to be the tooth fairy. If you ever see a fat, slobbery, over-weight, waddling tooth fairy, know that it’s a fake. It’ll be the farmer’s wife, slithering her way from the kitchen sink pretending to spread fairy dust. That ain’t fairy dust!
I really don’t know what the real world is coming to.
Back to Index
Next Story
Previous Story