2502. Personal trainer
© Bruce Goodman 24 August 2022


I enjoy my job as a personal trainer. Sometimes however I get the feeling that this particular client I’m with now – Monica is her name – has hired me for two one hour sessions a week because she’s heading for fifty and I’m young, handsome, and muscular.

Push! Push! You can do it Monica!

Push-ups would be the bane of most body trainers. Personally I try to do 500 push-ups a day. Most of them I do while accompanying clients. If I don’t get to exercise myself I get flabby pretty fast and it doesn’t have the same sex appeal so you don’t get hired by middle-age women and homosexuals.

Good on you, Monica! You can do it if you put your mind to it!

Of course this woman – Monica – is completely out of shape. She’s shaped like a pile of you-know-what. She couldn’t walk to the door without getting puffed. Still, she pays well, which is all I care about.

Up and down! Up and down! Come on Monica!

Cor blimey – she’s useless.

Come on Monica! Up and down! OK, that’s good. Now let’s try the other eyelid.

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