1476. Weeds and a cauliflower
© Bruce Goodman 23 November 2018






It’s happened before and it’ll happen again, believe me, said the proud cauliflower to the surrounding weeds.

The little weed seeds had just begun to germinate in Farmer McGregor’s vegetable garden; right next to the proud cauliflower.

Last time, said the proud cauliflower, Farmer McGregor came along and pulled out all your weedy forebears and threw them over the fence. I alone was left to survey my lovely weedless kingdom. One prickly thistle, two deep-rooted docks, and a dandelion; to say nothing of all the other countless unnamed weeds that had become too familiar with me in my garden. As I say, it’s happened before and it’ll happen again, believe me.

Farmer McGregor is just waiting for you to grow a little bigger and then he will come along, yank you out, and toss you worthless lot over the fence. Unlike you, I’m permanent. It’s not half obvious that I’m the one in charge.

Here comes Farmer McGregor’s wife, Miranda, now. She's carrying a long knife. Hee hee hee. She sometimes exterminates young weeds with the carving knife. You watch. You'll see just how right I...




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