1175. Waste not, want not
© Bruce Goodman 11 November 2017






Norbert and Bertha decided, prior to their wedding day, that they would have as many children as possible.

“That way,” said Norbert, if one of the children gets killed and we need a hair transplant, for example, there’s a whole resource just lying there.”

“It’s like money in the bank,” said Bertha. “Who knows, as we grow older, whether we’ll need a kidney or a liver or even a heart and lungs transplant.”

“Not to mention the eyes,” added Norbert.

And so began their years of procreation. The first thirteen were fine. And then Bertha died giving birth to the fourteen and fifteenth. They were twins and Bertha suffered an amniotic fluid embolism.

As luck would have it, Norbert was able to use, with the right treatment, her remains to fertilize his lawn.




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