2724. Restacking shelves
© Bruce Goodman 14 May 2023

Man: Hi. Excuse me, but I see you are stacking the shelves of the supermarket. So I guess you’re not a regular shop assistant, but a part-time worker employed simply to unpack boxes and stock shelves.

I wonder however if you could help me. I’m looking for the whipped-cream-filled lemon cheesecakes. I’ve looked in all the freezers and I can find them anywhere. Perhaps you might have come across them as you restock things.

It seems to me that you ought to know as you’re obese, the result I suspect of eating an unhealthy diet. In fact, you’re straight-out fat. I like to call a spade a spade. You look disgusting.

Shelf Stacker: I don’t give a hoot where the whipped-cream-filled lemon cheese cakes are. And I wouldn’t show you if I knew, you ugly piece of crap. In fact, if I came across a whipped-cream-filled lemon cheese cake right now I’d squash the whole cheese cake into your ugly face. Frozen or not.

Man: I announced in a note to all the staff – to the administrative staff and all the workers – that the customer is always right. You don’t seem capable of it. You’re fired.

Ex-Shelf Stacker: In that case, you wizened-up little man, you might be interested in tasting this container of cayenne pepper instead.

Contact Author
Back to Index
Next Story
Previous Story